


I’ll be Wonder Woman if you’ll be Superman

by joyboo



Category: Criminal Minds (US TV)
Genre: F/M, Hotch saves the day, Undercover, new relationships, serial killer on the loose
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-06-25
Updated: 2019-03-02
Packaged: 2019-05-28 13:52:58
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 11
Words: 13,361
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15050552
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/joyboo/pseuds/joyboo
Summary: The reader must go undercover for a long stretch of time as Derek’s wife. That wouldn’t be so bad except she’s in a brand new relationship with Hotch...and she has no idea how to pretend to be a wife.





	1. Chapter 1

The unsub was killing mixed race couples. That was why you now found yourself undercover with Morgan in Albuquerque. JJ was out on maternity leave, leaving you as the only viable option for the wife. You weren’t exactly comfortable with the situation because this was your first time going undercover. Thankfully, Morgan was an old hat at it which helped ease your nerves somewhat. Both of you were unattached which definitely helped.

  
Your house was in a middle-class neighborhood and you both had ‘jobs.’ Morgan was a work from home and you were working part time at a coffee house as a throw back to your high school and college jobs. Another aspect of your cover was that you were active in a church and looking to start a family. You had just moved to the area for a change of scenery and because Albuquerque was a good place to put down roots.

Morgan drove into the driveway and looked over at you. He could read your nerves and gave you a reassuring smile. He put his hand palm up on the center console, “It’s gonna be ok, Mama.”

You made yourself return the smile and put your hand in his. “That obvious, huh?”

  
“Come on, let’s go in.”

  
You and Morgan went through the motions of settling in. As it got closer to bedtime, you felt trepidation creeping up your spine. “You ok?” Morgan asked, coming up behind you and putting his hand on the small of your back. You jumped and flushed bright red. With an embarrassed chuckle, you said, “Yeah, just nervous I guess.”

  
“About your new job?”

  
You nodded, picking up one of the throw pillows off the bed and hugging it close, “Among other things.”

  
Morgan ran his hand up your back, settling it on your neck and massaged for a moment before moving to what would be his side of the bed.

  
“Tomorrow why don’t we swing by the coffee shop to get your schedule and meet some of your new coworkers?”

  
“Together?”

  
“Of course,” he said, returning to you and he tucked you into his arms. “You got this Bryn.”

  
In that moment, you were grateful that your last name could double as a first name, same as Morgan. He continued, “Just remember to breathe. The more comfortable you get living this life, the easier it will be.”

  
You nodded, returning the embrace, “I know, I just don’t do well with change.”

  
“I know. It’s only temporary,” he reminded.

  
You nodded again and pulled away slightly. “I’m not good at PDA.”

  
“I know. We’ll only do what you’re comfortable with.”

  
“Can—can we—?”

  
“Kiss?”

  
You flushed again. Morgan smiled, cupping your cheek in his hand. You felt his calluses from the work he did on his houses. You knees started trembling. “It’s ok, Brynna,” he breathed, inching closer. His lips were dry but soft. You could tell he knew what he was doing, but there was no magic. You prayed you would be convincing enough through this ordeal.

  
Morgan leaned back with a wry smile, “Not the usual reaction I get when I kiss a beautiful woman.”

  
You grimaced, “Sorry. It’s all still weird and new.”

  
“One step at a time.”

  
You crawled into your side of the bed and curled around a spare pillow again. Morgan joined you after checking windows and locks. “I should warn you, I tend to sprawl when I sleep,” he told you.

  
“Mkay,” you murmured, making eye contact. He was on his side facing you. His dark eyes were glittering from the light filtering in through the window. “I’m glad to be doing this with someone who’s done it before,” you whispered.

Morgan smiled, “Easy as pie.”

  
“Have you ever made pie? It’s one of the most frustrating things in the baking world.”

  
“I didn’t know you baked.”

  
“It’s one of my hobbies. It’s therapeutic. I usually take them to local shelters. It’s a good stress relief with everything we see.”

  
“I never realized how little I know about you.”

  
“Well, I’m the newest one, and we’ve been busy. What with the wedding and all,” you said with a wry smirk, referring to the case and work in general.

  
Morgan started dozing off so you didn’t say anything more. Your mind was racing too much. You flipped to your back, staring at the ceiling, finally allowing your mind to wander to yesterday...

 

 

The plan had been well underway but there was one aspect giving you undue anxiety. You had never dated before and now you were supposed to be someone’s wife. You had retreated to the women’s bathroom to pace in private. You were chewing around one of your thumb nails which was your nervous tick.

  
You knew it had to be Morgan, but if you were honest with yourself, he intimidated you. He oozed sexual confidence. Would anyone really believe the two of you as a couple?

  
The door opened and you froze when you saw Emily. “Hey,” you said sheepishly.

  
“Hey yourself. Everything ok? You’ve been in here for half an hour.”

  
“Yeah, just wrapping my mind around everything. I process better when I’m alone.”

  
“Are you sure that’s it?”

  
You hesitated,looking to your shoes before admitting, “I’ve never dated anyone before. Let alone kissed anyone and now I’m supposed to pretend to be a wife?”

  
“I though you and Hotch were—“

  
Your head snapped up, but Emily continued, “I’ll be right back.”

  
“What are you—?” But she was gone and you resumed pacing. You considered hiding in a stall when the door opened again. You tensed, becoming absolutely rigid when your unit chief walked in. “I’m gonna kill her,” you grumbled, turning your back to him.

  
“Prentiss said you wanted to talk to me?”

  
“Prentiss should learn to mind her own business and not profile her coworkers,” you dropped your head into your hands for a brief second before running your fingers through you hair with a deep sigh.

  
You felt Hotch’s hands on your upper arms and you drooped, feeling him press against you. You leaned into him and he asked, “What’s wrong, Y/N? I thought you were ok with this assignment.”

  
“I am, I just don’t know if I’ll be convincing. I’ve never been in a relationship before, Aaron.”

  
“With your loving nature, it’s going to come naturally to you. What’s really bothering you?”

  
You sagged in defeat and mumbled the reason under your breath.

  
“What was that?” Hotch asked, turning you around to face him. You couldn’t meet his eyes and were chewing your cheek.

“Y/N—” he cajoled.

  
“I’ve never kissed anyone or been kissed or however you’re supposed to say it,” you said, but it came out in a rush, almost like one word.

  
Aaron couldn’t stop his chuckle. “Don’t laugh at me,” you grumped, punching him in the arm.

  
“Ow...I’m sorry. You’re right, I shouldn’t laugh.”

  
“I just don’t want my first kiss to be with someone I don’t have feelings for because its part of an act.”

  
Aaron sobered and waited until you looked at him, “I know we’ve been taking things slow, both for your sake and mine and because we weren’t ready for the team to know, but it seems they know something because Prentiss came to me saying you needed me.”

  
“You’re rambling,” you mumbled.

  
“I know,” he sighed, before taking a deep breath, “May I kiss you, Y/N Brynna?”

You were pretty sure your face was as red as a tomato and you were aware that your mouth was agape but you couldn’t seem to close it. Speechless, it was almost a full minute before you were able to pull yourself together. “You would do that?”

  
“Of course. I was just waiting for the right moment.”

  
“And the women’s bathroom because I feel uncomfortable is the ‘right moment’?” You asked wryly.

  
Hotch chuckled, pulling you closer, “You didn’t answer my question.”

  
You hid your face against his chest, “Do I have a choice?”

  
“Of course, you always have a choice. I’m never going to force you to do something you’re not comfortable with in our relationship.”

  
You wrapped your arms around him and listened to his heartbeat. “You’re a good man Aaron Hotchner.”  
“Is that’s a no?”

  
It was your turn to chuckle, looking up at him, “Is it weird that I’m more nervous about this than being bait in an undercover assignment for a non-disclosed amount of time?”

  
“I’ll be right there in Albuquerque with you. Only a phone call away.”

  
“I know,” you said straightening to your full height, barely reaching his shoulders “I just feel like a nervous school-girl and naive. Love is supposed to be like the fairy-tales right? Shooting stars and rainbows and happily-ever-afters.”

  
Aaron pressed a kiss to your forehead. “That’s not naive. It’s what you deserve.”

  
You looked at him dubiously but found nothing but honesty in his countenance. Your breath caught as you realized he was coming closer. His lips pressed against yours and there was suddenly too many sensations to keep track of. Aaron’s arms wrapped around you, pulling you close. His lips were moving and you did your best to keep up. You eventually needed to pull away to catch your breath. Aaron was breathing just as hard too.

  
You heard the door open and hid behind Aaron. Of course it was Garcia. She had one hand fake covering her eyes, “Safe to enter? There’s a line forming. Girls gotta pee.”

  
You started giggling and couldn’t stop. Aaron was blushing too, but not nearly as badly as you. He left first and you followed closely behind, making a beeline for your desk in the bullpen. You made yourself avoid eye contact with everyone, but out of the corner of your eye, you saw Rossi waiting for Hotch outside his office. You heard him say, “The bathroom? Really?”

  
“We’re not having this conversation,” Aaron said, blustering past him.

  
You meticulously ignored everyone, working on the case files littering your desk. You weren’t sure how much time had passed when your realized someone was in your space. Looking up, you saw Morgan had rolled his chair into your cubicle. “Hey Morgan.”

  
“You ok, Mamas?”

  
“I will be. Just processing.”

  
“You ready?”

  
“In theory,” you answered with a wry grin.

  
His look was intense so you sat up straight and looked him directly in the eye, “I’ll be ok, Morgan. Really. I can do this.”

  
“You have to be completely committed, Bryn. In public and in private. We can’t slip up.”

  
“I know.”

  
Morgan reached over and squeezed your thigh before rolling back to his desk. You heard your phone ding and saw it was a text from Hotch,

—so—shooting stars?—

  
You couldn’t help the cheesy grin that lit your face. You looked up at his office but he was studiously looking at his desk.

—and rainbows—

  
—good :)—

  
You chuckled, Aaron never struck you as an emoji kinda guy but it definitely made you smile.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for your patience! I’ll post two chapters to make up for lost time. Feel free to comment! I love feedback :)

Morgan started snoring softly and you were brought back to the present. At home you’d play on your phone until you went to sleep. You had a phone as part of your cover, but with the bare minimum on it. Garcia had made you a fake Facebook page and hidden your real one for the time being. You didn’t want to wake up Morgan, and weren’t sure how heavy he slept.

You slipped from the room and moved to the kitchen. You looked through the cabinets, familiarizing yourself with where everything was. You found your favorite tea and a tea kettle and settled in with a book from the bookshelves lining the hallway. 

You and Morgan had taken pictures to make it look like you had been together for a while. You’d had your cover story drilled into you over the last few weeks. You’d of course met in church in Morgan’s hometown of Chicago. You’d been visiting friends and lecturing at a local college. The two of you had stayed in touch and Morgan eventually moved to Boston where you were living.

Tired of being cold, you decided to relocate to the Southwest after you were married. You’d married a month ago and had taken your honeymoon backpacking through the Appalachian with stops at B&Bs to resupply and rest. 

You finished your cup of tea but kept staring at the same page, unable comprehend any of the words you were repeatedly rereading. 

At some point you must have drifted off because you woke up to noises in the kitchen. You looked at the clock on the wall and saw it was 6:30. There was a blanket draped across you and you smiled at Morgan’s kindness. You wrapped the blanket around you and moseyed to the kitchen, sitting on one of the stools at the bar. Morgan was making coffee and cutting up some fruit.

“Morning, beautiful,” he said.

“Hey, how’d you sleep?”

“Better than you, I’m guessing. You ok?”

“Yeah. Just, new bed I guess.”

“New bed, new town, new job, new church, new husband,” he said with a smirk at the last part.

“The new husband is the bit that worries me the least.”

Morgan came around the counter and wrapped you in a side hug, pressing a kiss to your temple. You leaned into him for a moment, still not used to touching anyone in such an intimate way. “So what’s for breakfast?” You asked with a grin.

“Day 1 of being married and you’re already giving orders?”

“Mmhmm... Said to make it realistic right? So chop chop.”

Morgan laughed and went back around the counter, “What’ll you have mama?”

“What’s your speciality?”

“I make a mean omelet.”

“Sounds good.”

You watched him move through the kitchen with confidence. You sipped your coffee staring out the screen door that opened out into your new back yard. 

“Whatcha looking at?” Morgan asked.

“There’s garden beds in the yard.”

“You garden?”

“No, always wanted to but I’ve never had time. My Nana gardened.”

“Mom or Dad’s mother?”

“Dad’s. Big Irish family and she was the matriarch. Lot’s of cousins.”

“Any siblings?”

“A brother named Spencer,” You said with a smirk, referring to your cover story. 

Morgan set a plate in front of you before sitting next to you with his own, “When do you want to head to the coffee shop?”

“Maybe this afternoon? We could get lunch then go over. I wanna explore the house and neighborhood first.”

“Wanna go for a run?”

You groaned, “ You know, for a minute there it almost felt like a vacation.”

“Come on, physical activity is good for you.”

“Easy for you to say muscle man.”

Morgan chuckled, looking at his phone when it pinged. For now, only the members of the team had your phone numbers, with ghost numbers in case anyone looked over your shoulder. “It’s Spencer.”

“How appropriate that my brother is your best friend. What’s he say?”

“There was another homicide last night.”

Your mouth went dry and you had to force yourself to swallow the bite of food you had in your mouth. “What did we get ourselves into?”

Morgan put a hand on your shoulder in a comforting gesture as he stood to do dishes. You refilled your coffee cup and moved out to your back patio. There were chairs and you curled up in one, enjoying the fresh air and the beautiful morning.

You weren’t left in peace for long because Morgan opened the door to announce, “Come on Mamas, day isn’t getting any younger. Let’s go on that run.”

You groaned, but followed him, putting your mug in the dishwasher and going to locate your running clothes and shoes. Morgan planned out a route for a three mile run. The two of you fell into an easy pace, own head phones plugged in, but you wave to any of your new neighbors you ran into.

When you reached your house again, the two of you helped each other stretch on your front lawn. A woman came out of the house beside you, toddler on her hip and baby in a carrier. You stoped and waved and the lady gave you a frazzled smile. We were wondering when you were going to show up. Your movers said you were on your honeymoon.”

“Yes ma’am,” Morgan said, coming and wrapping an arm around your middle, you smiled up at him and returned the gesture. 

“How old?” You asked, indicating the toddler she was wrestling into a car seat.

“A month shy of two and the baby is 5 months.”

“Sounds like you have your hands full.”

“No kidding,” she replied. With both kids strapped in, and leaving a door open, she came over, hand outstretched, “I’m Katie, Katie Auburn.”

“Morgan Cooper,” Morgan said shaking her hand, “And this if my wife, Brynna.”

“Please, Brynn,” you said, returning her handshake too. 

One of the kids started fussing in the care and Katie took off with a wave, “We’re off to an appointment and can’t be late. See you around.”

The two of you waved at her and she pulled out of her driveway. You walked back into the house, hand in hand. You took turns in the bathroom and you explored the house while waiting for Morgan to finish up. There was a master bedroom with attached bathroom, 2 bedrooms—one that had been turned into a guest room, the other an office for Morgan to ‘work’ out of. There was a living room with a small desk for you, a dining room connected to the kitchen and a den that had a sectional and a big screen TV.

“Ready for lunch?” You asked, poking your head in the door. Morgan was reorganizing his clothes because apparently the FBI techs posing as movers had done it wrong.

“I’m almost done,” he grumped. You flopped on the bed watching him, “I didn’t know you were so OCD,” you teased.

“I’m not OCD,” he defended, “Just particular.”

You laughed and started a game on your phone while you waited, when you were out of lives you whined, “Come on babe, I’m getting hungry.”

“‘Babe’?”

“Just testing it out. It’s unusual for only one person in a relationship to use pet names.”

“Pet names?”

“You hardly ever use my real name. Most often you call me ‘Mamas’ or ‘Beautiful.’”

“I do that with everyone.”

“Only with those closest to you, and the particularly absurd ones you save for me and Garcia, I mean Penny. And since here, that’s just me, it would make sense that I would have a common endearment for you. Any suggestions?”

“The only ones coming to mind, only Penelope can call me. Even though she loves you, I don’t think she’d be ok with you calling me ‘Chocolate Thunder.’”

You laughed, “I’m not ok with calling you ‘Chocolate Thunder.’”

“I don’t know that calling someone ‘babe’ or ‘baby’ is ever going to come naturally for you. You’re not prone to pet names.”

You nodded, “Mom forbid them so unless it’s the short version of someone’s name, I just don’t think to do it.”

“Then let’s not force it. It has to feel natural.”

You nodded again and sat up on the bed, “Are you done yet? I’m hungry,” you stuck your bottom lip out in a pout.

Morgan came over and pressed a kiss to your forehead before grabbing your hand an pulling you towards the living room, “So where we going?”

“I’ve heard the Range Cafe is good.”

“Let’s go then.”

 

After lunch, you went over to the coffee shop. It looked relatively busy but the clientele were nice. Walking in, the two of you waited in line. At the register you asked, “Hi, is Stacy here? My name’s Brynna, I’m supposed to start here soon.”

“Oh right, Stacy told me about you, let me see if she’s free.”

The girl called someone over who rang in your order and you and Morgan moved to the hand off plane to wait. A matronly woman came up to you, “Hi? Brynna?”

“Hi yes, Brynn, please. You must be Stacy.”

The two of you shook hands, “This is my husband Morgan.”

“Ma’am,” he said, shaking her hand.

You could tell the woman was a little awed by him and you couldn’t blame her. You had been the first time you met him too.

The barista behind the counter called out your drinks—Morgan a dark roast, you a latte. 

“Do ya’ll have a few minutes to sit down and chat?” Stacy asked.

“Sure,” you replied, looking to Morgan with a shrug. 

Stacy gestured to an empty table and talked you through a bit of what the job entailed. It all seemed straight-forward and you were grateful to see the espresso machines were a kind you were familiar with. Stacy gave you your schedule for the next couple weeks and you got to meet a few of your new coworkers. They all seemed nice, but there were still butterflies in your stomach as you and Morgan pulled out of the parking lot. You desperately wished you handled new situations better than you did, you just didn’t like change. 

You and Morgan chatted about things you saw as you drove. You opted to swing by the church you would be visiting on Sunday so you would know where it was. “I wish unsubs would quit using religion as an exclude for their actions,” you mused as you sat in the church parking lot. 

The only thing the couples had in common other than race differences was that they were all active in their churches. The unsub had a pattern of three couples in a church before moving to the next. The murder this morning was the first couple from this church and you hoped by making your presence know, he would pick you and you could catch him before anyone else needed to get hurt. 

The next day you had your official orientation at work. The day was relatively short and you were grateful to get home again where you could drop the pretense and didn’t have to keep answering the mundane questions you were being asked as a newcomer. You collapsed on the couch as soon as you walked in and Morgan looked up from where he was working on his laptop, “Long day?”

“I forgot how exhausting this work could be.”

“You smell like coffee.”

“Yeah, you should get used to that. I’m pretty sure I have syrup on my arms and whipped cream in my hair. I need a shower.”

“Well, you know where the bathroom is.”

“That’s a lot of work,” you whined.

Sunday morning, you walked into the church hand-in-hand. You were greeted by some cheerful people who directed you to the young couples class. You mingled some before the class started. The group seemed very nice, but the couple that had been killed had been a part of the class and everyone seemed preoccupied. After class, another couple sought you out. They were mixed too and their names were Abigail and Ethan Morehouse. You and Abigail hit it off, but you could tell Ethan and Morgan didn’t have much in common. 

The four of you moved to the sanctuary together and Abigail insisted you sit with them. Throughout the service, you did your best to participate in the songs and you took notes during the sermon to keep yourself focused. You and God were on rocky footing at the moment due to the horrors you saw with the BAU and you knew Morgan had a Catholic background, but you weren’t sure if he was practicing or not.

When the service was over, you said goodbye to your new friend and headed home for a light lunch. Afterwards, you decided you needed a nap. When you woke up again you heard quiet noise from the other room and found Morgan watching TV. “Bored yet?” You asked, coming to sit next to him.

“God yes,” he declared, wrapping an arm around you. 

Even though you were uncomfortable with the gesture, you leaned into him. Practice makes perfect, right? 

“We’re gonna need something to fill our time. I at least have a real job.”

“Hey, I have a real job.”

“Yeah, that doesn’t really exist,” you stage whispered.

“Nobody but you knows that but you mama,” he said poking you in your side.

So far you had managed to keep your ticklish ness hidden from the team, but no more. “No!” You squealed, jumping up from the couch. 

“Nu uh,” he said standing and following you—more like stalking you. “How did I not know you were ticklish?”

“Stay away from me Morgan Cooper.”

Morgan laughed and lunged but you were able to dodge him. You ran for the sink and grabbed the sprayer hose, “You will carry this secret to the grave.”

“Not completely to the grave. There’s cameras. I’m sure Penelope has seen at least part of our antics.”

“Swear to me Morgan, and I’ll put the hose down.”

“I don’t mind getting a little wet,” he said inching closer.

An hour later you were almost done cleaning up the mess from your fun, or rather you sat on the counter and directed Morgan since it was his fault anyway. Maybe these next couple weeks wouldn’t be so bad after all.


	3. Chapter 3

Several weeks later, the two of you had settled into your routines and you could almost believe this was your life. You were spending more time with the couples at church and you were even starting to learn some of the regulars at work. 

You really missed Aaron, and the rest of the team, but mostly Aaron and the relationship developing between the two of you that had been put on hold. 

“What would you say to a long weekend?” Morgan asked one Thursday evening.

“What are you talking about?”

“Well, a bird told me that there’s a cabin in the woods outside of Santa Fe and that your brother and your best friend Penelope and her husband are coming to visit.”

“Wait, what?? Really?”

“Really, really, beautiful.”

You squealed and leapt for joy, launching yourself into Morgan’s arms. He caught you easily and spun you around, “ I could tell you’ve been homesick.” The next part he whispered in your ear, “Hotch misses you too.”

Tears pricked your eyes but you made yourself swallow them back and kissed him on the cheek “Thank you. What’s the plan?”

“We’ll head up tomorrow after you get off work and then we’ll get back in time for the evening service on Sunday.”

“Will we be able to...” you trailed off, not finishing the thought. 

“We’ll be able to be ourselves,” he assured you.

 

—*—

As soon as you pulled up to the cabin, you saw Aaron on the doorstep, a rare, genuine smile on his face. Derek had barely stopped the car when you opened your door and ran to the man you loved. Aaron wrapped you in his arms and you tucked yourself against him and breathed in his scent. You heard chuckles and saw Garcia and Reid nearby, but you were perfectly content where you were and neither you nor Aaron moved. 

The other three went into the cabin and Aaron pressed a kiss to your lips. There were the sparks missing with Morgan. When you pulled away, you whispered, “Hi.”

“Hi beautiful.”

“I miss you.”

“I miss you too.”

“Do you know how much longer?”

“Not yet. We haven’t made much progress on the profile.”

You didn’t comment on it, choosing to say, “I never thought I would miss touching somebody. We were never really a touchy family, but touching Morgan just doesn’t feel the same as when it’s you.”

“That’s a good thing,’ he said with a chuckle, turning so he could tuck you into his side as you headed inside. 

It was great catching up with your friends. After dinner and a conversation filled with much laughter and banter, the three of them went to their rooms, leaving you and Hotch in the living room. “I feel like I’m doing something elicit,” you said from your place snuggled against him on one of the couches. 

“Hardly. We’re both consenting adults, and if I do say so myself, we’re a pretty cute couple.”

“Does the stoic Aaron Hotchner have a romantic streak in him?”

“You’re just gonna have to find out, aren’t you?”

Aaron started running his fingers through your hair, and you melted into his lap. “How’s Jack?” You asked, tracing a pattern over his jean clad knee.

“He’s doing well. Getting good grades at school, enjoying baseball. He misses us.”

“Us?”

“Well sure. I told you he likes you.”

“Liking me and accepting me are two very different things.”

“You’ve become a part of our routine and our lives and he knows how much you care about him.”

“How often do you get to talk to him?”

“Almost every evening, at bedtime.”

“I miss him too,” you told him after a pause. After another pause, you sat up but couldn’t look him in the eye, “Can I ask you something totally random and a little weird?”

“Of course.”

“The other night I was out with some girls form the church and talk turned to...uh...marital relations and I had to fake my way through the rest of the conversation.”

“What do you mean?”

“Girls talk about everything and I mean everything. And—I don’t have anything to talk about. I’m faking being a wife, but don’t really know anything about the marriage bed as it were. I mean I have a vague understanding, but no personal experience.”

“That’s not necessarily a bad thing,” Aaron said, catching your meaning.

“I’m not saying it is. I’m not ashamed of the fact that I’m picky, I just...” you trailed off.

“Y/N, are you asking me to debauch you?”

You flushed bright red and pushed yourself a little farther away from him. Was that what you were wanting? Aaron chuckled and you wished the ground would swallow you whole. “Hey, don’t be embarrassed. Everyone goes through this at some point, nerves are perfectly normal.”

You still couldn’t look at him.

“What’s making you feel so uncomfortable?” He asked, taking one of your hands in his.

“I don’t know. It’s just never been my reality and I purposefully avoided daydreaming about it.”

“What do you mean?”

“Men have never been lining up for me. Sex has never been on the table.”

“And now?”

“‘And now’—what?”

“Do you trust me?”

“You know I do,” you said finally looking at him so he could see you roll your eyes.

“Well I am definitely interested if you are?”

“Really?”

“Of course. You’re magnificent.”

“Hardly,” you said with a self-deprecating chuckle. 

“You’re not just fishing for compliments are you? You truly don’t see how amazing you are.” Hotch pulled you close again, and made you look at him. “You’re one of the smartest people I know. Your compassion for others reminds me how human we all are. You see the good in the world despite the darkness we muddle through every day. You play on the swings with my son because its his favorite thing to do at the park. You remember everyone’s coffee order even when they’re complicated. Your eyes light up at the first star you see every night because it brings you joy. You call your grandmother after every case to check in and see how she’s doing. You insinuated yourself into my life without me even realizing it and now I don’t know what I’d do without you. These last few weeks without you have been torture.”

You didn’t realize you had teared up until Aaron wiped a tear off you cheek. “You’re not too bad either,” you said at a loss for words. You were feeling awkward and your anxiety was swiftly mounting. 

“Hey, look at me.” He waited until you did, “I love you.”

You couldn’t stifle your gasp and he chuckled again. “I mean it Y/N. I love you. I was going to wait until after all of this was over, but figured you needed to hear it. Let’s head to bed.”

You let him lead you to the room you were sharing. He closed the door behind you and you leaned against it watching Aaron for cues. He ran his hands down your arms staring at your lips. You were warm all over and felt yourself trembling. You weren’t sure if it was nerves or more. There were too many conflicting sensations. Fireworks exploded when his lips met yours. 

Aaron’s hands were on your hips and you brought yours up to loop around his neck. The hair at the base of his head felt soft against your fingers. Aaron pressed you against the door and you couldn’t help the noise you made. His lips left yours, trailing to your neck. You’d never known how sensitive your neck could be. He started unbuttoning your shirt and his light touch almost tickled. 

You struggled to get air back into your straining lungs. You whimpered when Aaron’s hands reached your skin, pulling you close again. You gasped Aaron’s name when you felt his hands on your breasts. He was saying something but you couldn’t make out the words. You untucked his shirt from his jeans. He was so warm. His skin rippled as you ran your hands around to his back. 

Aaron went slow and was exceedingly gentle. He made your first time everything you had always hoped it would be. 

The following morning, you were sore which you hadn’t been expecting. And not just in places you had assumed. You were sore all over, almost like after a round in the gym with Morgan. It wasn’t necessarily painful, but it wasn’t comfortable either. You were awake and aware that the room was lit by the morning sun. Aaron had woken you up when he gently moved you so he could get out of bed. You had been wrapped around each other and you felt blissfully cherished.

You heard Aaron in the bathroom and cracked an eye open. Seeing the pillow he used, you pulled it to you and buried your nose in it. When Aaron returned, he sat on the bed next to you and brushed your hair from where it had fallen across your face. “Sorry I woke you,” he murmured.

“‘S-‘Kay,” you mumbled back.

“How are you feeling?”

You couldn’t stop the smile that split your face and you didn’t want to. Aaron smiled too and kissed you. “Breakfast?” He asked. You crinkled your nose, it was too early for food. “Coffee?” He offered instead.

You nodded and he kissed you again before standing and leaving the room. You made yourself get up and used the facilities. You stared at yourself in the mirror feeling completely different and exactly the same all at once. You gave yourself a once over and were equal parts amused and irritated when you found several hickies. Aaron definitely had a romantic streak. And a possessive one.

You threw on your shorts from the day before and made the impulsive and cliched decision to wear Hotch’s shirt from the day before. You sat back on the bed and settled against the headboard. Aaron reentered with two steaming mugs and sat next to you, handing you a steaming receptical of the glorious dark matter prepared exactly how you liked it. You groaned in pleasure as the first sip of coffee touched your taste buds. You leaned into Aaron, “I realized there was something I should have told you last night that I didn’t.”

“What’s that?”

“I love you too.” Aaron didn’t say anything but you saw his smile as he wrapped an arm around you. “How long can we stay,” you asked.

“The two of you should be back in time for the evening service so we have through tomorrow morning.”

“Is anyone else awake yet?”

“Reid is on his fourth cup of coffee and his third book. Garcia and Morgan are bickering like the old married couple they pretend they aren’t.”

You chuckled, drinking from your cup again, snuggling into his side. “We should probably join them,” you said begrudgingly.

“They’re perfectly fine without us. And I for one am perfectly fine with having you all to myself.”

You smiled and reached up to kiss him, tasting the coffee on his breath. “Me too. I’ve missed you. Morgan may be Garcia’s ‘Chocolate Thunder’ but he’s got nothing on you. Plus its refreshing not to have to pretend for a bit. I hope we catch him soon.”

“We will. And then we’ll be able to really explore our relationship.”

You gasped playfully, “Aaron Hotchner, are you my boyfriend?” You started giggling and couldn’t stop, causing Aaron to start laughing too.

“What’s so funny?” He asked once you’d calmed down some.

“They really need to come up with better, more sophisticated names for adult couples. It’s so weird to think about you as ‘boyfriend.” 

“I’ll be your boyfriend if you’ll be my girlfriend.” You giggled again but he continued, “Let’s see, lovers?” He asked, kissing you.

“Better, but still awkward.”

“Partners?”

“Too much like work.”

“Significant other?”

“Different kind of awkward. Like I said, they should get on that.”

“I’m sure Reid could give you a complete etymological break down on all the words used to describe couples in a relationship.”

“Ugh. I’d need another cup of coffee before that could happen.”

“Ready to face the kids?”

You laughed, “You do kinda fall into the patriarchal role with them sometimes don’t you?”

“Rarely, but when I got our coffee, they were all being nosy.”

“They’re just curious about the shift in our dynamic. On some level I’m sure they’re worried things might change. Does Strauss know yet?”

“She knows some, I haven’t told her that we’re exclusive yet.”

“Do I need to transfer to another unit?” You asked quietly.

“No. I’ll make sure of it. I don’t think Garcia or Reid would let you anyway.”

The assurance put you at ease again. You finished the last swallow of your coffee and started to get out of bed but Aaron grabbed your hand to stop you he took your mug and paced both his and yours on the nightstand.

“What is it?” You asked, confused. Aaron didn’t answer, but grinned devilishly before kissing you soundly. Naturally it escalated and it was almost lunch time before you finally emerged from your room.

 

“Oh my God! Is that a hickey?” Garcia demanded, reaching for the collar of your shirt. You smacked her hand away and with a smirk, Garcia continued, “Looks like your wife is cheating on you Derek.”

“I’m probably happier about it than I should be as the wronged husband,” he faked offense with a smirk. 

The three of them continued to give you grief but you could tell they were pleased that the two of you were happy.


	4. Chapter 4

     The rest of the day and the following morning passed by faster than you expected and saying goodbye to Aaron was excruciatingly hard. You spent most of the drive back to Albuquerque blinking back tears of frustration. Morgan understood and didn’t try to push conversation for which you were eternally grateful.

  
      As you reached the city again, you made yourself return to the head space of Brynna Cooper. Back home you did some laundry and puttered around the house until it was time to go to church. Once there, you didn’t see Abigail and Ethan but figured they had gone to the morning service. You chatted with other couples you were friends with and they all asked how your trip had been and at your blush, they all gave you knowing looks. Derek smirked when you looked at him for help, but you were on your own.

  
      The service started and you enjoyed the worship portion. When you all settled down for the message, the pastor seemed disturbed about something. Dread filled the pit of your stomach and you and Morgan shared a look. You wished you could call the team and find out what was going on.

  
      When the pastor spoke, he said, “I just received some devastating news. Many of you knew Ethan and Abigail Morehouse.”

  
      Your stomach dropped and terror gripped your heart. Morgan took your hand in his. No. Not your friends. It was supposed to be the two of you, but your trip to Santa Fe took you out of the running. The rest of the pastor’s words became background noise as your blood started rushing in your ears. Tears flooded your eyes and spilled over until they were a constant stream. You couldn’t help it. They were your friends. Derek tucked you into his side. You told yourself this was part of the act, what any friend should do, but it was a visceral reaction.

  
      There was a shift in attitudes around the congregation and Derek tensed. Pulling away, you heard the pastor say something about the FBI. Looking up you saw your team and just seeing Aaron helped put you at ease. They gave the profile and asked anyone who knew the Morehouses to talk to them after the service. The pastor gave a brief message before turning to prayer, asking for fortitude and a quick resolution in the face of such adversity.

  
      After the service was dismissed, those who knew the Morehouses were asked to meet in the Fellowship Hall to talk to the police and FBI and give statements. You and Derek went with the rest of your small group and thankfully you weren’t interviewed by anybody you knew. You weren’t sure you would be able to keep up pretenses.

  
      The team was studiously trying to avoid eye contact with the two of you, as were you and Derek. After being interviewed, couples were moving to the entryway to mourn and seek comfort with one another. You and Derek headed that way but that meant you had to pass by Hotch and Rossi who were standing by the door watching the body language of those being interviewed. As you approached, you and Aaron made eye contact. Derek used the ruse of seeing what the FBI was doing to keep you safe so that you and Aaron could have a quiet conversation.

  
      “If we hadn’t gone to Santa Fe he would have gone after us and we could have caught him. They didn’t need to get hurt.”

  
      “It doesn’t help to speculate.”

  
      You pierced him with a furious glare, “I know that, but she was my friend and my selfishness put her in harms way.”

  
      “We don’t know that. I’m sorry,” he said touching your elbow. You shifted away, looking to make sure nobody was watching.

  
      Derek brought a hand to the small of your back, directing you to leave. It was still several hours before you made it home and you felt completely drained. You felt raw and guilty. You should have been able to save your friends.


	5. Chapter 5

A couple weeks had passed and your nerves were frayed. It was starting to affect your sleep and the stress was causing your period to be late which just exacerbated everything. You felt like you were coming down with the flu. You did your best to keep up appearances but the pretense was beginning to wear on you. You were not made for undercover work.

After your Wednesday night small group, you were talking to some of the other wives about how you weren’t feeling well. You were constantly nauseous now. “Oh my gosh, are you pregnant?” Your friend Heather asked.

“Am I—” you trailed off, realization hitting you. Aaron had used a condom, but you couldn’t remember if he had each time. You sat down slowly doing some math and realizing it was definitely possible. 

Derek sensed your turmoil and came to rescue you, saying you had an early morning the next day. As soon as you were in the car Derek asked you what was wrong.

“Just something Heather said,” you replied.

“And that would be?”

“I was telling her about how I haven’t been feeling well and she asked if I was pregnant.”

“Could you be?”

“I—I don’t know. I guess technically I could be.”

“Do you want to stop by the store to get a pregnancy test?”

“That’s probably a good idea.”

Derek pulled into a Walgreen parking lot and parked. When it didn’t seem as though you were able to leave the car, he went into the store without you. A few minutes later he returned with a sack. He pulled out your favorite candy and you ate it numbly as you tried to process your revelation. 

Back at the house, Morgan handed you the pink and purple box. Your hands were shaking as you took it. In the bathroom you read the instructions which seemed pretty straight forward. The three minutes were going to feel like agony. You set the timer on your phone and took the test with you back into the bedroom. Morgan had been sitting on the edge of the bed, elbows on his knees and chin resting on his hands, but he stood when he saw you. 

“I have to wait,” you muttered. He came over and gave you a hug, pressing a kiss to your temple. You were numb, and yet so anxious you weren’t sure you could function. You started pacing and Morgan leaned against the wall. 

 

Across town, the rest of the team was working in the field office, each on their own part of the profile. Garcia was in an office, but stuck her head out, looking for Hotch, “Uhh...sir,” can I talk to you for a minute?”

Hotch entered and Garcia closed the door. “What is it, Garcia?”

“So, you know how I’ve been keeping tabs on Derek and Bryn like you said? Well they just made a purchase at a Walgreens.”

“Yeah, so?”

“I think you need to know what they got.”

Hotch quirked an eyebrow, but moved to look at the receipt on Garcia’s screen, “I don’t understand. What is that?”

“It’s a pregnancy test. Sir.”

Hotch froze for a minute before sitting down slowly. His face was stony, harder than normal as he worked to mask his emotions. He desperately wanted to call her and pull her out of the operation but knew it would break protocol. Plus he didn’t know what the result of the test was yet. “I think it goes without saying that I’d prefer this stay between us.”

“Of course, Sir. Do you want me to call her for you?”

“No. Thank you.” Hotch stood again and left the office and even left the room. The rest of the team watched his exit and then looked to Garcia, curiosity written across their faces. Garcia worried if she had been right to tell him.


	6. Chapter 6

It was Saturday night and something woke you up from a deep sleep. Morgan wasn’t in bed next to you, so you sat up looking for him. You found him—tied to a chair at the foot of your bed. He was equal parts scared and pissed, a gag keeping him from making a sound. The next thing you noticed was the gun pointed at your head. 

The unsub’s face was in shadow so you couldn’t tell who it was. From the reports, you knew what was coming next. Your hands were tied to the bed post, your mouth was gagged, and he would torture you before turning to Morgan. Then you would die, then Morgan. What the unsub didn’t know was that the bracelet you were wearing had a panic button you could press to alert your team. You started pressing SOS in Morse code but were interrupted by the first couple of cuts. Your eyes teared at the pain. He started on your thighs, cutting your shorts and shirt away before carving shallow cuts for maximum pain. each time he paused, your pressed your bracelet, praying your team was on their way. 

Morgan was straining against his bindings just as much as you were. It felt like an eternity had passed before he took a break, turning now to Morgan. You were starting to feel light-headed and the fear was becoming all-consuming. Where was Aaron?

You lost consciousness but you weren’t sure for how long. When you came too, you felt the unsub’s touch on you again. You couldn’t see through the sweat, tears, and probably blood in your eyes. He was pulling your gag out of your mouth and you started pleading, “No, please, stop. Please, I’m pregnant, please don’t kill my baby.” You were hysterical but needed to say the ‘b’ word aloud before you died.

“Shh, Y/N. You’re gonna be ok. I’m here, I’ve got you.”

Hands were untying the ropes and you pulled away from the hands, not wanting to deal with anymore pain, “Please, no.”

“Y/N. Y/N it’s Aaron. Y/N look at me.”

You finally registered his voice and all the tension left your body. Sobs came quickly and you couldn’t stop them. You gripped Aaron as though your life depended on it. Aaron was directing people around you and you filled with fear when you realized you didn’t hear Morgan. 

“Derek? Where’s Derek?”

“Right here, Mamas.”

“Did you get him?”

“Yeah, he’s going away for a long time. You’re going to be ok.”

“Aaron? Aaron?” You called, searching frantically trying to find him in the sea of faces again. 

“I’m here.”

You clutched his hand with yours, “Aaron, I’m pregnant. The baby, is the baby going to be alright?”

“I don’t know, my love. But I know that I love you. You need to do what the medics tell you.”

You had been fighting against them so you could talk to Aaron, but finally you could relax again and listened to their instructions.

 

Morgan had been beat up pretty bad, but was in much better shape than you were. He was holding his bruised ribs. “Hotch, I’m sorry. He drugged me, I couldn’t—”

“Don’t go there, Morgan. You’re both alive and that’s what matters.”

Everyone was now outside the house as CSU processed the scene. Morgan was sitting in the doorway of one ambulance getting cleaned up. You were on a gurney outside another. Your eyes tracked Aaron as he directed the scene. You could see that your neighbors were all on their lawns watching the events as they transpired. You were so tired. Your eyes started closing against your will. Your vision was blurry. You heard someone yelling. Where was Aaron?

Hotch heard a commotion and saw the EMTs rushing around you, hurrying to get you into the ambulance. “We got this, Hotch. Go,” Rossi told him.

Aaron hopped into the ambulance with no hesitation. He watched the EMTs work. Your heart had started beating too fast. Aaron felt like his world was collapsing. Again. He didn’t want to go through this again. He didn’t think he could.


	7. Chapter 7

You woke up to beeping. You were in a hospital room but you were alone. It hurt to move so you didn’t try. There was a window next to the door and you could see nurses bustling around outside. Aaron came into your view and you could see him arguing with someone on the phone.

He looked like he hadn’t slept or shaved in days. Looking around your room, you found a board with the date. Doing some math you realized it had been a week since the attack. You looked back at Aaron and the two of you made eye contact. He ended his call abruptly and you could see the relief in his eyes before his mask dropped again and he went stony-faced. Aaron alerted a nurse that you had regained consciousness before rushing to your side. “You’re awake,” he whispered.

You gave him a sad smile, “I’m sorry.”

“You have nothing to be sorry for.”

“Then why do I feel so guilty?”

Aaron pressed a kiss to your forehead and you gripped his hand in yours. “Thank you for saving me.”

Aaron broke eye contact and his shoulders drooped, “We should have reached you sooner. It shouldn’t have taken me so long.”

“Please don’t beat yourself up.” After a paused you asked, “Who was it?”

“You didn’t recognize him?”

You shook your head no. 

“His name is Eric Thomas. He’s from Louisiana and is deeply racist.”

“That doesn’t make any sense. Wouldn’t he want us to know who he is?”

“He would, but he was devolving.”

You didn’t want to know anymore so changed the subject, “Did you hear me? Back at the house?”

“What do you mean?”

“When I thought you were the unsub.”

“Yes. I heard you.”

“That’s not how I wanted you to find out...Is the baby ok?”

Aaron pressed your hand to his lips for a brief kiss, “The doctors say its too early to tell. The baby is currently fine, but that doesn’t necessarily mean everything will stay that way. Between the trauma and the stress, only time will tell.”

Tears flooded your eyes and started leaking. Joy and terror were fighting within you in equal parts and you struggled to reign in the emotions. You were suddenly gripped in panic, emotions all over the place, “Are we ok?”

“What are you talking about?”

“We’ve never talked about kids and now a baby and the case and oh god, Jack!”

“Shh,” he hushed. “We may not have talked about it, but that doesn’t mean I’m any less happy. I know your mind is reeling right now, but I don’t want you to doubt how much I love you.”

Aaron wiped the tears away from where they were streaming down your cheeks and kissed your forehead, cradling your face in his hands. You brought your hands up to his wrists. You saw lingering bruises on your arms, peeking out from under bandages. 

“How is everyone?” You asked softly.

“Morgan is back to annoying Garcia. JJ’s taking some leave to spend time with her boys. Reid went to see his mom.”

“That’s good. People need to be with their families. How’s Jack?”

“He’s getting anxious. He’s got a break this weekend and Jessica’s bringing him to visit since we’re going to be here for a while longer.”

“He’s coming here? But Aaron—“

“Shh, we got the bad guy. It’s safe and he misses us.”

“I miss him too. When do they get here?”

“This evening. They’re probably at the airport now.”

“How long do I need to stay here?”

“We’ll need to double check with your doctor now that you’re awake but she thought that once you woke up, it’d be a couple days.”

“Do we need to stay for the case?”

“No. Local PD has enough to make it without us. The unsub confessed and he was caught in the act.”

“What all did he do to me?” You whispered.

“You don’t remember?”

“It’s in pieces. Did he do what he did to the other women?”

Aaron sat down in the room’s chair, drawing it close to the bed. He wiped some stray hairs off of your face gently, “You have twent-eight cuts, ten of which needed stitches. On your right thigh he carved the words ‘mine,’ just like the other women.”

“Did he—” you had to clear your throat. In the other cases, after torturing the women, the unsub would beat the husbands, then rape the wives before killing both. You couldn’t finish the question but Aaron knew where you were going. 

“No. You were still clothed and there were no signs that he assaulted you.”

You gripped Aaron’s hand in yours, grateful for that small mercy. “That you for being here for me.”

“There’s nowhere I’d rather be.”

You managed a small grin at the cheesy line.

 

Not long after, a nurse and doctor came in to check you over. They seemed to think as long as nothing changed, you’d be able to go home the following afternoon.

 

*****

“Hey, look who’s awake and moving,” Morgan said, coming into the room as you were returning from the bathroom. Garcia was right behind him with several ‘get well soon’ balloons. Tears pricked your eyes as Morgan wrapped you in a gentle hug, “Hey Mamas.”

“Are you ok?”

“Yeah. I’m good. Garcia’s taking care of me. Just bumps and bruises. How are you feeling?”

“Tired. Beat up. Very ready to go home.”

“I hear Jack’s coming to visit,” Garcia piped up.

“Yeah, it’ll be so good to see him,” you replied, settling back into your bed.

Aaron smiled, bringing his hand up to cup your head. You leaned into him but had to straighten when you felt stitches pulling. The four of you chatted until Aaron said he had to go to the airport to get Jack and Jessica. You felt a brief moment of panic until Garcia settled in the chair Aaron had vacated. They weren’t going to leave you alone.


	8. Chapter 8

“Y/N!” Jack called, running into your room. He scurried onto your bed before Aaron could stop him and you were wrapped in a tight hug. You reveled in his hug and returned it just as eagerly, ignoring the painful twinges it brought. You let Jack pull away first and he settled in beside you on the bed. He was chatting away about what he’d been doing while you were undercover and then about their trip on the plane. 

“And everything is so brown out here and the buildings are different and the cars are all white. And—”

“Jack,” Jessica interrupted, cutting him off. You smiled at her and at the sudden end to Jack’s verbal vomit. “Aren’t you forgetting something?”

“Oh! Right!” Jack jumped off the bed again. 

You started laughing but had to stop due to pain in your side which you immediately pressed a hand to, trying to ease it. Aaron noticed, but your attention was on Jack who was claiming a gift bag Jessica had been holding. Jack was soon climbing onto the bed again and handed you the now slightly smooshed bag. 

“What’s this?” 

“We wanted to get you something ‘cause Dad said the bad guy hurt you and we though it’d help you feel better.”

“Jack, that’s so sweet.”

You pulled the tissue paper off the top of the bag and found a bright purple monkey stuffed animal. “Aww, he’s adorable. Thank you.” You looked the monkey over, “What’s his name?”

“It’s a girl monkey.”

“It is?”

“Yeah. Her name’s Gypsy.”

“Gypsy? That’s a good name. It fits her.”

You and Jack talked some more while Jessica and Aaron had a quiet conversation in the corner. Garcia and Morgan had made their exit when Jack and Jessica had arrived. As much as you were enjoying Jack’s company, you were worn out. You were resting against your pillows, running your fingers through Jack’s hair. He was still animatedly chatting away, telling you a story from school. You felt eyes on you and looked up to see Aaron watching you, a soft smile on his face. Jessica noticed his expression and looked at you too. 

“Hey, Jack,” she said. “We should get to the hotel.”

“But we just got here.”

“I know sweetie, but Y/N needs her rest.”

“You don’t want me here?” He pouted, turning puppy dogs eyes to you.

“Of course I want you here. But, they may not hold your hotel room for you if you’re too late.”

“Oh,” he said, still pouting.

“But I’ll get to see you tomorrow.”

“Can’t you come with us?”

“No honey. My doctors want me to stay here a while longer.”

“And Dad’s staying too?”

“Yeah, buddy,” Aaron replied coming to the side of your bed. “I’m gonna stay here and keep Y/N company and make sure she’s ok. And you’re gonna stay with Aunt Jessica and keep her company until we meet up tomorrow.”

“Will Y/N come too?”

“As soon as my doctors let me,” you said, hugging him to your side.

“Ok,” he said begrudgingly, sliding off the bed.

You grabbed his hand before he was too far away, “It’s so good to see you Jack. I’ve missed you so much. And thank you for Gypsy. I’ll sleep much better tonight having her to protect me.”

That got Jack to smile again and he reached up for another hug which you gladly gave him, pressing a kiss to his hair. You wished he didn’t have to leave, but you didn’t want him to stay at the hospital any longer than he needed to.

Aaron walked them out to their rental car and in their absense, the silence was deafening. Your mind immediately went back to that night and you had to get out of the bed. You went to the room’s window and looked out on the small courtyard a few floors below you. It was almost dark outside. You felt antsy and your skin was crawling. You needed out of the room, but you needed your clothes. You desperately wanted to pick at the scabs on your arms that were starting to itch. You moved to the windows by your door and watched the nurses at their stations. You started pacing.

 

“What’s wrong?” You jumped, turning to find Aaron in the doorway. He was at your side before you could respond. He wrapped one arm around you and took your arm with the other so he was supporting you. You were trembling without realizing it. “Let’s get you back in the bed.”

“No! Please, no. Aaron. I can’t.”

“Ok, at least sit down.”

You nodded and he lead you to the chair, helping you get settled. “What’s changed?” He asked, crouching in front of you.

“I don’t know. I just—that night in the house, on the bed. I knew you were coming for me, but I just—laying there I can feel what he did to me all over again. Aaron, how long until I don’t feel him every item I’m alone or it’s quiet or I lay down or I close my eyes?”

“I don’t know, baby. It’s different for everyone. Everyone’s brain processes trauma differently, but I know you’re strong and I know you’ll get through this. You are not alone.”

“I’m so tired, Aaron.”

“Do you want me to get something to help you sleep?”

“No. I don’t want to take any more drugs than I need to,” you paused for a minute and Aaron took your hands in his. “Did you tell Jessica about the baby?”

“No I figured we’d wait until we were ready.”

“You mean in case I lose the baby.” Your voice was hollow and you felt numb.

“Y/N, look at me,” he waited until you did. “Our little one is strong. They’ve held on this long and we need to have faith that they will be ok.”

“Ours...that sounds nice.”

Aaron stood and assessed the bed, “If we raised the bed so you’d be sitting up, would that help?”

“I don’t know,” you said looking at the bed dubiously. 

Aaron started pressing buttons on the bed’s remote and when he was done, he held out a hand for you. You made yourself take it and stand up. Aaron helped you get settled but you couldn’t loosen your grip on his hand. “Don’t leave me,” you whispered.

“I’m not going anywhere,” he assured you, but fear still gripped you. 

“Aaron...” you breathed.

He must have understood your distress because he crawled into the small bed next to you, pulling you close, mindful of your worst injuries. “Close your eyes, I’ll be here when you wake up.”


	9. Chapter 9

The next day you were released earlier than you had anticipated and were able to join Jack and Jessica for lunch. Afterwards, you all went to the Albuquerque zoo. Aaron insisted on getting you a wheelchair so you wouldn’t overdo it and faithfully pushed you to each exhibit Jack wanted to see.

That night you and Aaron got a room in the same hotel as Jack and Jessica. You were so tired, you fell asleep as soon as you closed your eyes. You woke up a few hours later, suddenly nauseous. Oh no, this wasn’t just an upset stomach. You rushed to the bathroom just in time to lose your dinner in the toilet. 

Aaron was instantly there, pulling your hair out of your face and rubbing your back. When you were done, you sat against him, breathing heavily, “What’s going on?” You asked.

“I’m afraid this is just the beginning, love. Haley’s morning sickness lasted through the second trimester.”

“But its the middle of the night.”

“I don’t know why they call it ‘morning sickness.’ It can hit at any time. If I remember correctly, JJ’s was pretty bad all the time.”

You whimpered, “I think I may have torn some stitches.”

Aaron helped you check them all and they looked to be intact. You brushed your teeth and settled back into bed, but you were wide awake now. Aaron fell back asleep fairly quickly and once relaxed, he turned to cuddle you. He pressed against your back with an arm draped over your middle, hand resting lightly on your abdomen. It was comforting to know that Aaron truly was happy about the baby. His actions in unconsciousness affirmed his words when he was awake. You’d never have guessed he was a smuggler. He always kept others at arms reach. It was humbling to see him vulnerable and you hoped he would never regret the trust and love he had given you. You loved him more than you’d have thought you could ever love another person. And then Jack—he was easy to love and you could easily see yourself a part of his life. You were amazed at how quickly and naturally your relationship had progressed. With Aaron in your corner, you knew you’d be ok. Eventually. 

*****

You were in your sixth month and Garcia was absolutely giddy with planning your gender reveal party. You weren’t back in the field yet and you were absolutely ok with desk duty. You were doing much of the paperwork for the team and were helping Garcia when you could, helping the team remotely. 

The party was at Rossi’s house and everyone had placed their bets on the gender. There was colored chalk in a ball set up. You had been planted in a chair with everyone waiting on you hand and foot. When you had everyone’s attention, Aaron tossed the ball and Jack hit is with a bat, sending pink flying everywhere. You squealed, jumping to your feet. Aaron had a huge grin on his face and was swinging Jack around who was yelling, “A sister! I was right! I get a baby sister!”

Everyone was hugging you until Aaron came over, Jack on one hip, to give you a kiss. You basked in his love for a moment before standing on tiptoe to press a kiss to Jack’s cheek. 

“Ok, ok, now that you know, you need to open presents!” Garcia instructed, pulling you back to the table. 

 

Once you were back home that night, Aaron put the presents in the nursery while you got Jack ready for bed. An hour later, you were in bed and Aaron was getting ready to join you. He crawled over to you, a large grin on his face, “We’re having a baby girl.”

You smiled back at him. “Yeah,” you said quietly. “You ready for pink and glitter and dresses and tea parties and baby dolls and everything that comes with girls?”

“Absolutely.”

“You’re going to spoil her aren’t you?”

“Absolutely,” he repeated, kissing you soundly. You laughed and let him love you.

Once you were both sated and drowsy, you had curled up to sleep on your side. You were in that space between wakefulness and slumber when you felt Aaron shifting on the bed behind you. You felt him press a kiss to the bare skin of your outer thigh and jumped when you realized what he was doing. 

“Aaron?” You murmured.

“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to wake you.”

“Why did you kiss me there?”

“When he carved this word, he was hoping to brand you and claim you for himself. You’re not his and never were and never will be. You’re mine. And I mean that in a totally mutual, respectful relationship kind of way, but you’re mine.”

A half sob/ half chuckle escaped and tears leaked out of your eyes. Aaron wiped the tears away, “Will you marry me?”

You were ugly crying now and sat up. Stupid pregnancy hormones. “Yes,” you managed to get out. “Yes, I’ll marry you.”

Aaron kissed you again and you started giggling, emotions all over the place. When you could form words again you said, “But not until after the baby comes. I don’t want to be fat for my wedding.”

“You’re not fat, babe. You’re beautiful. Perfect. Magnificent,” he said, punctuating each endearment with a kiss, “Strong. Fearless. Intelligent. The woman who holds my heart...”

You snorted, pulling away, “You’ll make my ego be as big as my belly. Oh,” you gasped as the baby moved suddenly. You pressed a hand to your belly, “Your daughter’s awake.”

Aaron started rubbing your bump in soothing circles and started talking to your daughter. Once the baby had calmed down again, you settled back in to get some sleep in the few hours left to you.


	10. Chapter 10

In the morning you found Aaron’s side of the bed empty when you reached for him. You looked over and saw a small jewelry box on his pillow. You were working to sit up when the door opened and Aaron came in with a steaming mug and a flower from the garden. He smiled when he saw you, “I was just bringing the coffee, but Jack insisted on the flower.”

“He’s awake? What time is it?”

You managed to reach the headboard and Aaron handed you your mug and flower. You smelled the flower before taking a sip of your coffee. “There appears to be a mystery box on your pillow,” you said, resting your mug on your belly.

“You haven’t looked at it yet?” He asked as he sat next to you. 

“No. I was busy trying to get upright. I never realized how much I would feel like a beached whale.”

Aaron reached across you and grabbed the box. You set your mug down on the night stand and tracked Aaron’s movements. He looked nervous and you weren’t sure why. He knew you loved him and you’d already said ‘yes.’

Aaron stared at the box, hesitating for some reason. You started doubting. What if he regretted asking you? You’d been pursuing a relationship with each other for less than a year and the baby had pushed your relationship along faster than it would have otherwise. You knew he still loved Haley, but his commitment to you seemed genuine. He looked up and seeing the sudden agony in your eyes, he rushed to calm you. “I love you, Y/N. So much so it’s unsettling sometimes. You helped put my broken pieces back together again after Foyet and your stability and heart are both so priceless to me. And I promise that I will spend the rest of my life doing the same for you. And I know you already said yes, but Y/N Brynna, will you be my wife?”

You were smiling like an idiot as Aaron opened the box to reveal a gorgeous ring. You gasped as you looked closer, “Is that—”

“Yes. Your grandmother knew how much it would mean to your mom for you to have her ring.”

“How long have you had it?”

Aaron slid the ring on your finger, “I got it not long after we got back from Albuquerque.” 

You looked up at him in wonder until he kissed you before bending to kiss your belly.

Jack piped up from the other side of the door, “Can I come in yet?”

You and Aaron both chuckled and Aaron called him in. Jack came bounding onto the bed and you hugged him when he launched himself at you. He hugged you around the neck, his sister around your belly, and then settled in to cuddle next to you. “Do you like your flower?” He asked.

“I love it,” you said, picking it up from the nightstand and brushing it across his nose. 

He crinkled his nose and explained, “It’s for your hair.” He reached up and tucked it behind your ear. You turned to Aaron who smiled, “Perfect.”


	11. Chapter 11

You and Aaron were slow dancing at your wedding reception. Jessica was keeping tabs on Jack for you and the team had been passing Emma around all evening. You looked up into Aaron’s eyes, “Today has been everything I ever dreamed it would be. Thank you.”

“Good. You’re very welcome, Mrs. Hotchner.”

You hummed in pleasure, “I wonder how long it’ll take to get used to that.”

“We have forever.” 

The two of you kissed and there were ‘whoops’ and cat-calls from around the room. You pulled away, burying your face in Aaron’s chest. You were so happy. You never thought you’d be this happy. Your musings were interrupted by Rossi who cut in and Aaron begrudgingly left you. Rossi started sweeping you around the dance floor and you laughed breathlessly. When he slowed down, he told you, “I’m so happy for you kids. You’re great together. And you make cute kids.”

“She is pretty adorable, isn’t she?”

As though she knew you were talking about her, Emma started fussing. Before you could break away, Aaron was claiming her from her Aunt JJ. She calmed almost instantly and Rossi reclaimed your attention. The two of you chatted for the rest of the song and then Derek was there taking his place. He playfully teased and flirted with you and kept you laughing. Spencer was of course next and you shared easy banter. Next came your second main man and you were glad it was a more upbeat song. Soon you and Jack had everyone laughing with your antics. About halfway through, Aaron joined you, Emma still in his arms and the three of you worked to get Emma laughing and were successful. 

Jack was eventually distracted and went to play with Henry. Emma was starting to get sleepy and Garcia claimed her to go settle her down in one of the rooms in the house. You and Aaron slowed to a gentle sway. “We should mingle,” you murmured. 

“I know. Just a little longer.”

 

A few hours later, you and Aaron were sent off with waves, cheers, and well-wishes. The team had of course figured out which car you were taking and filled your backseat with balloons and wrote “just married” and various other phrases on the windows. You and Aaron had few days off and kid free as a mini-honeymoon as the team’s gift to you. 

“You hungry?” Aaron asked. 

“Starving. And exhausted.”

Aaron pulled through a drive-thru and you munched on your fries while waiting in the parking lot of your hotel while Aaron checked in. You couldn’t wait to get out of your dress. It was beautiful, and everything you had ever wanted, but after 7+ hours in it, you were ready for sweats. 

Aaron returned and the two of you carried your stuff up to your room. You had to go through the lobby and everyone you passed smiled and offered congratulations. At the door to your room, Aaron looked both ways down the hall before dropping your bags and pressed you against the door in a searing kiss you felt all the way down to your toes. When he pulled away, you couldn’t help but giggle, “What was that for?”

“Because I can.”

He put the key card in the door and opened it but before you could step inside, he swooped you up in his arms and carried you over the threshold. You squealed and then started laughing. “You are so cheesy.”

“But you love it,” he said, lowering you to the floor with another kiss. 

“I do love it,” you replied, returning the kiss. “Almost as much as I love you.”

There were rose petals on the bedspread and a few more on the table where there was a bottle of champagne on ice. You sat on the edge of the bed and ran your fingers through the flowers, “This is one romantic gesture I’ve never understood. They don’t really serve a purpose and I would imagine they’re a pain to clean up.”

You looked up to where Aaron was puttering in your bags and saw him holding up your favorite comfy shorts and t-shirt. “Have I mentioned how much I love you?”

It was Aaron’s turn to laugh. He helped you out of your dress and you enjoyed the freedom your lungs finally felt as well as the ability to move around again. You laid back in the rose petals just in your underwear. Aaron had been saying something, but stopped mid-sentence when he saw you. “What?” You asked, still uncomfortable and self-conscious with your post-baby body.

“‘Beautiful’ does not even come close to describing you.”

You flushed and sat up, holding out a hand to him. When he took it, you pulled him down next to you and he plopped willingly in a wave of roses so you were facing each other. Aaron had taken off his coat, vest, and tie and the first couple buttons of his shirt were unbuttoned. Aaron propped himself on one elbow and looked at you softly. 

“Hi Mrs. Hotchner.”

“Hi husband.”

“I see what you’re saying about the petals. It’s a nice sentiment, but a little gross when you think about it.”

You chuckled, “How do you think the kids are doing?”

“We’ve been without them not even two hours and you’re already worrying about them.”

“It’s my job as their mom to worry about them. This is the first time one of us hasn’t been with them overnight since—since—well since Albuquerque.”

“They’re in good hands. We won’t get a chance like this to be alone very often.”

“I know.”

“Come on,” he said sitting up, “Let’s get you ready for bed and get this bottle of bubbly open.”

You let him pull you up and half an hour later, you were in your PJs, face washed, hair down, curled up on Aaron’s lap in one of the room’s chairs. You had a flute of champagne you were enjoying and you and Aaron were talking about the wedding and reception. You were starting to drift asleep. Aaron took your drink from you and stood, carrying you to bed. You were asleep almost as soon as he turned out the light.

About 2 o’clock you woke up out of habit, usually needing to feed Emma about this time. You found yourself cuddled up to your new husband. He may keep everyone at arms length, but when he let his guard down, he was the most gentle person you knew with the biggest heart. Aaron’s phone started ringing and looking at the time you told him to ignore it and he did, until your started ringing immediately after. “No!” You grumbled. You missed the call on yours but when Aaron’s started ringing again he answered it. “We have a few days off. You know that right?—Uh, did you raise the terror alert? Who’s getting the kids? Ok. We’ll be there as soon as we can.”

“No,” you whined again, burying your head into a pillow.

“I’m sorry, baby but they need us.

You kept grumbling, but climbed out of bed, rubbing your eyes, “The kids?”

“JJ’s dropping them off with Jessica.”

“Alright,” you huffed, “Let’s go save the day.”

“Always.”

I’ll be Wonder Woman if you’ll be Superman.”

Aaron chuckled, coming to press a kiss to your lips, “Deal.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh no! We’ve finally reached the end. It’s been quite the journey! Thanks for reading along with me. Hope you had as much fun as I did!


End file.
